Sunday, June 12, 2005

Pleated Pants

Starting sometime in the Dark Ages, a guy with a pear-shaped body named King Arthur dictated that pants could only be made with pleats on the front. Since he'd behead anyone that didn't do what he said, everyone wore pants with pleats and officially started one of the WORST fashion trends of the last millenia. Finally in the 1900's, an underground movement began to believe that King Arthur and his followers were finally losing their grip on the world and started eliminating pleats. It was a bold move, that many didn't accept, and many still don't accept. Obviously they are still terrified of losing their heads.

As for me, it took me until about the turn of the millenium to become aware of the horrible look on my body, making me appear pear-shaped, as was the plan of the original King. So a good friend of mine decided to take me under her wing, and help me to recognize that pleats were UGLY! Seeing as how ALL of my pants and suits consisted of pleated fronts, it was a bit of shock to my closet and wallet.

So now I have three pairs of pants left, all that go with suits, so they're covered by a suit coat and you can't really see the pleats. But now I look in the mirror and see a pear and need to get rid of them and complete my transformation. It's a big moment for me. It's a big realization for me that I'm excited about but also nervous about. Because with my luck, as soon as I get rid of the last pair I'll find out King Arthur's not dead, and I'll get my head chopped off! I just can't win!

Friday, June 10, 2005

uClean Vacuum Cleaners

uClean is the source for Vacuum Cleaners, Commercial Vacuum Cleaners, Industrial Vacuums, and other Cleaning Equipment.

Here's some examples of Vacuums uClean offers:

Eureka Sanitaire 684 Vacuum Cleaner

Windsor VP10 Backpack Vacuum Cleaner

Windsor Sensor S12

Windsor Sensor XP12 Vacuum Cleaner

Windsor Wave Wide Area Vacuum Cleaner

Monday, June 06, 2005

Underwear Model

I never thought that I would be able to add the title of "Underwear Model" to my resume. But as of about 4:30 today, I will be officially a model of Underwear!!! Not too sure how I feel about this, but it's certainly exciting, and nerve-wracking!

Now, just so everyone knows, it's LONG underwear. I kind of feel like one of those Cabella's models standing in the hunting lodge around a fire, holding a cup of hot chocolate after a long day chasing Buck Deer all over the mountain and now apparently my jeans are dirty and my long johns are clean so I stand there with only them on, and my hair perfectly combed.

As a side note here, anyone that has EVER been hunting knows that there is NO REALITY to these pictures. First of all, the long johns anyone is wearing are so old and so ugly you'd never wear JUST THEM, in front of ANYONE!!! Let alone wearing them in front of a bunch of other gun-toting men. I mean, come on, men, and I mean REAL MEN, hunting type MEN, don't hang out in their long johns, or any other type of underwear for that matter!

So yes, I will be wearing underwear for a camera today! I think this is the start of my modeling career! Underwear, hand model, shoe model, etc...

New York here I come!

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Clever and Witty

I wish upon wish that I was really clever and witty all the time, or even some of the time would be nice...

I often times THINK I'm clever and witty, but usually someone reminds me that I'm not. I'm never more reminded of that fact than when I sit down, want to write a clever or witty blog, and NOTHING comes to mind.

If someone would write and then SELL witty and clever blogs to people like me, I think they could make a fortune!